Start free trial

Deciding on Divorce, and Telling Your Spouse

By Neta, founder of SortMyDivorce · 11 guides

THE SHORT ANSWER

Two different hard things, usually in this order: working out whether you actually want this, and then finding the words. Neither is a legal question, and both shape what happens legally afterwards.

Or work through it

Whether to do it, and how to say it out loud. Use the divorce checklist — free, no signup, nothing leaves your device.

Start here

Should I Get a Divorce?

A reflection framework for people weighing whether to divorce — not advice on what to choose, but questions that help separate fear, hope, and fact.

Legal Separation vs Divorce in Canada and the US

What legal separation actually means in Canada and the US, how it differs from divorce, and why most provinces have no separation status at all.

Telling Your Spouse You Want a Divorce, Kindly

How to plan and deliver the conversation where you tell your spouse you want a divorce

Everything else in this section

Amicable Divorce: What It Means and How to Have One

What an amicable divorce actually means, when it is realistic, and the practical steps that keep one from turning contested.

Contested and Uncontested Divorce: Cost and Timeline

The difference between a contested and an uncontested divorce, what each costs, how long each takes, and how to tell which one you are heading for.

Do You Have to Be Separated Before Divorce?

Whether you must be separated before divorcing: Canada's one-year rule, US state waiting periods and separation requirements, living separately under one.

How to Prepare for Divorce Before Telling Your Spouse

How to quietly and fairly prepare before you tell your spouse you want a divorce: what to gather, what's reasonable to do, what crosses a line, and how to.

How to Tell My Husband I Want a Divorce

How to prepare for the conversation itself: what to say, when and where to say it, and how to protect yourself emotionally and physically if there's any.

How to Tell My Partner I Want a Separation

How to plan and have the conversation about ending a common-law or unmarried partnership, including what's different when there's no marriage to legally end.

How to Tell Your Wife You Want a Divorce

How to have the conversation, what to prepare first, and what not to say — written for the person who has already decided.

Scared to Tell Your Spouse You Want a Divorce

Why the fear of telling your spouse you want a divorce is so common for both husbands and wives, the different forms that fear takes, and how to prepare

Other sections

Preparing and getting organisedA letter or a deadline just arrivedMoney, property and disclosureSettlement and negotiation

These guides are general information, not legal advice. Laws change and differ by jurisdiction — confirm specifics with a local family lawyer or your court's official website.

Coming soon.

We are opening SortMyDivorce to a small first group. Leave your email — no payment, no obligation.

🔒 Your details stay private — never shared, never sold.